Category Archives: Swearing

A pep talk from my backseat driver

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When Liz was about two years old, we went to a Christmas party.  This party was at a house way up in the mountains, on a dirt road that had been covered in snow for weeks.  I had a car with 4WD, so the drive up there was no problem…but then it was time to go home.

As soon as I nosed the car on to the road, I slid.  I slammed on the brakes.  The anti-lock did what it was supposed to do, but the ice was solid, so the brakes were making a razz noise at me while  I was cussing up a pollution.  We hit a patch of snow.  I was able to sink my tires in and get enough traction to push us forward as opposed to sideways, but that was about all.  I started sliding again.  I slammed on the brakes again, got razzed again, and tested the limits of my colorful vocabulary again.

I was able to pull out of the second slide and realign my car with the road.  By then, I was dropping F-bombs left and right.

From the back seat, two year old Liz piped up, “Don’t say fuck, Mom!  Be brave!  Be HAPPY!”